You know that immense amount of self-doubt you have hours or days before stepping into the exam room; be it written or practical? Yup. That's me EVERYTIME. It eats away at my confidence not all at ones but bit by bit until the time comes for me to face the music. But Alhamdulillah, OSCE WENT SO WELL! Can't even believe myself. It's like some kind of ghost just possessed me; especially during our Contact Lens OSCE, one station after another, things just glides on like a flowing river. Can't thank anyone better than God for giving me the wisdom and strength to carry on. This means only one thing, that I get to go back to my hometown according to schedule omg!!! No remedial exams! Yay! Been away from my family for almost 4 to 5 months now that it is driving me insane. They are so far yet so close I can't even deal with being away from them this long. Usually before going back I would have this mental note of what I will be doing once I'm home. Not all will be fulfilled given other activities such as Eid, which I will be celebrating with them loved ones and more. But some of the notes are;

  • New songs to practice on my piano and guitar; much dreaded by my sister xD Sorry sis, DEAL WITH IT! 
  • Baking, baking and baking. 
  • Cafe hoping with le friends (missing them so much it hurts my soul)
  • TV shows (We have tv in our rent house but it's just there, no one watches it)
  • Following dad from town to town for his events (road trips are awesome I tell you, nothing compares)
  • Salted egg yolk custard pau (I NEED THIS, I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH)
  • Play and hang out with le kitties to my hearts content
  • Just be at home and be myself with my loved ones around me 
Nothing beats being home and knowing all is well and that you can sleep, like really sleep without worrying about commitments and all that bullshit. I always wanted a place to myself, I still do, but everybody knows that nothing beats having your family around. I can already imagine me coming home at odd hours from my future place (Inshaa Allah xD) just to feel the presence of my family and knowing they are there. It is the biggest blessing anyone can ever get in this dark and twisted world that gets ugly day by day, with all the current happenings. And if God wills me the time and effort of updating this blog during the holidays, I might slip a post or two haha. Not that anyone cares but yeah. My space, my blog. Anyway, gotta finish my notes! Exam is FAR from being over and the dreaded last paper syndrome is already upon me from OSCE being over xD. Bye!

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