Tokyo Ghoul

First and foremost, let me just get it out there that I am NOT an avid anime/manga junkie. I don't have the patience to sit through 60 plus episodes per season. I've tried, believe me, I gave up at at least 10. Heck, I can't even keep track with Game of Thrones. Just an fyi if I ended up butchering this beautifully and disturbingly written manga. Sorry in advance xD

I admit I never heard of Tokyo Ghoul right until Michelle Phan and some other youtubers decided to post a collaborative makeup video featuring some of the characters in the anime being, Rize, Kaneki♥, and Juuzou. Having nothing to do due to oversleeping during the day and having my sisters binging on Haikyuu leaving me alone with my thoughts, I thought why not? It got me from the very first episode.

It's not easy for me to get hooked to a korean drama, let alone an anime. One thing that kept me coming back for more is that I'm not too far left behind. I don't have like 12 seasons to catch up to to get to where others are now. It's only in season 2 and season 3 (can't wait!) is coming Winter 2016. I think haha. Another thing is how each episode is not too lengthy. I'm simple like that. If you are new to Tokyo Ghoul, I advice you not to carry on reading. SPOILER ALERT. Although maybe not that good of a spoiler but spoiler is a spoiler.

One scene that got to me was when Kaneki finally had enough of the torture he got from Jason and finally fought back. Just before he ate Jason, i think, he gave Jason a piece of his own medicine by asking him to start counting while Kaneki stabs him with his Kagune. The only thing is, Jason has had his share of that torture. He was tortured in the same way he tortured Kaneki in the past by some disturbed Dove when he was captured. That scene got to me because Kaneki inflicting pain onto Jason because Jason inflicted pain on him due to Jason's need to cope with the trauma of the pain inflicted onto him by the Dove.

It occurred to me that when a person breaks someone to the point of no return, Jason in this case, a cycle may occur. It is not one person you broke. Different people have different ways of coping and some may resort to inflicting the pain they felt onto others. When that happens, many more will be the victim of one man's decision to inflict pain. That's also what happened to Juuzou. Due to his past of also being a torture victim, he also enjoys inflicting pain on himself, and onto others although not too high of a scale, limited to the fascination he got of crushing ants between his fingers, and the joy of killing ghouls. My heart breaks when Jason started counting and the lone tear fell from his eyes. Also everytime Kaneki cracks his fingers, the way Jason does before he starts his torture, just like how the Dove used to do with Jason. As cruel and gruesome that scene is, it is the one that really got to me.

I'm really liking this series that I am considering reading the manga. It's a long shot but who knows? Btw, Uta is one hot ghoul.

Patiently waiting



That time when you are in a room full of people yet you have never felt so alone. The feeling of wanting to say everything yet the fear of slipping tounge might jeopardise the bond you've worked so hard to form with others. But staying silent and the distance you set between them is also the things that will slowly but surely loosen the same bond, that will eventually be broken in the end. 

Lost Stars by Jung Kook


I never paid much attention towards our Jung Kookie but it all changed when I found his cover of Zion T's Sofa and this recent cover just made it so much more easier to now and in the future, pay more attention to this Golden Maknae of BTS. Saranghae uri Jongkookie! Thanks for the cover! 

"But are we all lost stars
Trying to light up the dark"

Cat Bites

I've been around cats ever since I can remember, even before from what I heard from my mom. So, getting bitten by one or two is yesterday's story. I've been bitten so much that my hands are full of scratches and bite marks accumulated over the years. Getting bitten by a cat which results in such deep wound that blood ended up dripping all over the floor, now that's a first. And that's what happened last Hari Raya Haji back in Kota Belud, my village.

Let me tell you a bit about the cat that bit me. It was a tom cat, very friendly. But like most cats, especially strays, they have higher tendency to bite and scratch you. I wouldn't say he was an aggressive cat. Cat people who know their ways around cats would know this type of cat who firstly comes off very friendly and loves being patted and played with but like a switch, it would turn around and bite you at any chance they could get. My lil cousin, Afif have had his share of the cat's bites and scratches last time but of course, being the bigger cousin with more experience than him, I thought I knew my way around the cat. Me being me, I was just playing with the cat when it all happened.

It all happened so fast that all I could remember was blood squirting out of my wrist while I was on my way to the tap to wash off the wound. Rather than it being painful, which it is, I was mostly scared because one, the blood wouldn't stop pouring out, two because the bite was on my wrist and three, the left side of my lower palm is so inflamed that it scared me. All kinds of scenario went through my head in that few minutes of me washing off my wound waiting for my sister to come with whatever medication she could find. When the blood stops pouring out of me, that's when I started to feel light headed. All I could feel was how cold and throbbing my hand was. As if being lightheaded from all the blood lost isn't scary enough, my sister told me that my lips are turning pale. But nothing half a bottle of green tea couldn't fix except maybe diabetes that is. Sorry, not funny.

 After everything sorta simmers down a bit, that's when I saw trail of my blood on the ground. Didn't get to snap any pic though, was too shock to even think of it. Went up to the house to find out the whole house of uncles and aunties had found out about my blood pouring episode and unable to eat due to my swollen throbbing wrist is deemed unusable. Btw, it was the right wrist. Never knew the importance of my hand right until I couldn't even tie up my own hair.

Luckily, my wound wasn't infected and now instead of the obvious bruised up wrist, my hand is getting its strength back. Slight pain when overworked but nothing major. Only the wound which is healing nicely gets very itchy from time to time and I can't even scratch it since it is still a tad bit painful to put so much pressure on it. It's like when you got a mosquito bite on the sole of your feet and you can't scratch that part without it getting ticklish and even more itchy that it originally was.

But one thing I will not be able to forget was how the cat came back to me for more patting after he bit me. Goes to show that cats will be cats. Even after centuries of taming, human can never totally 100% get the wild out of the cats but at the same time it is a creature who yearns contact and love from us humans. It's always going to be a love hate relationship between us and that's the beauty of it. Respect is always the priority and let me tell you, cats will not shy away in telling us humans who's the boss. Commence, pictures of my bruised wrist and couple other unrelated pictures. Enjoy!

Instagram photo shoot xD. 
No cheesy captions were harmed in the making of this insta post.

 2nd day. 
You can see the bruise starting to form. 

 Still painful but the wound is starting to heal up a bit.

 Me being me, can't take my eyes off the bruising. 
idk, I have this fascination towards bruises. 

It appears light in pictures but it is enough to scare my roommates and classmates

 After standing so long at the ordering counter not knowing what to order
French toast from The Loft@KLIA2

 Always loved the cosy ERL ride 

 Commencing, hipster shots xD

 Not the cat who bit me. 
Just a stray cuddling up to me while I wait for my taxi to arrive

How can you not like cats?

방탄소년단 (BTS) 화양연화 on stage : prologue


This is only the prologue. I don't know how I can wait until October for this. SO BEAUTIFULLY DONE. From the cinematography, to the story line. Army, let's use these few weeks left till Oct ready our hearts and mind so that we don't collapse of overload before, after and during the release. BTS hwaiting! I am already hooked to Butterfly as of now, I kid you not. I'm not one to be faithful to one group for too long and by the looks of it, BTS is quite a group for me to be hooked this long. 

"너무 아름다워 두려워"

Miguel - Coffee

I wish I could paint our love
 These moments in vibrant hues
 Wordplay, turns into gun play
 And gun play turns into pillow talk
 And pillow talk turns into sweet dreams 
Sweet dreams turns into coffee in the morning

Green fingered or not?

Green finger. That's what they call those individuals who whenever they decide to plant something, anything, things always falls the right way. Some may even manage to rescue a plant or two from succumbing to the non-green fingered peeps who even with the guidance of instructions, even if they follow every steps and rules; always results in the death of their plants. Well as for me, I fall kinda in between. This is because, there are rare occurrences that I would decide to plant anything due to the nature of the earthworm or any other worms that lives underground and also, it never crossed my mind to leave the comfort of my bed to the hot sun, sadly (blame it on the wifi.) But with a bit of coaxing and when I've reached my internet overload, I twice went for it. First was when Dad literally dragged us to the back of the house to join him plant the easiest vegetable to grow, Chinese water spinach or more commonly known as Kangkung. To those of you who don't know, this plant can literally grow anywhere there is water supply and sunlight. Mostly found near wetlands which is no big surprise but locally it is known to be found growing at the edges of the longkang. Yup, that's how easy this plant is to grow that even in the harshest condition, well I consider the longkang to be harsh anyways haha, it manages to grow. I've seen maybe a bunch of them growing on the edges of the big longkang behind our house once. So, back to the story, I thought why not give it a try and no, Dad got his kangkung to plant from other source, not the longkang behind our house ok. With Dad guiding our every step and doing all the hard work of digging the earth and all that, I finally planted one kangkung. Mine and Dad are planted side by side. Few weeks went by and yup, mine died. Dad practically watered them everyday and his kangkung lives and mine died. After everything, it died. That practically dulled my spirit in this gardening game. But it was during post-spm rotting at home times when I had this sudden fascination towards sunflower. It was when I randomly spotted a packet of sunflower seeds at the agriculture section of the supermarket that I thought to myself, why not? But like always, procrastination won me over and after few month I think; I remembered the seeds. So, I went outside looking for empty pots and alas I found one with only weeds (or so I thought) growing on it. Killing two birds with one stone they said. I could clear the weed and even plant a new flower on it. I pulled out the weed and planted my sunflower in the pot; 3 of em if I'm not wrong. How wrong was I when I found out that the plant I thought was weed turned out to be a flowering plant only the flower have yet to grow xD. But it is out of the pot, damage is done, proof is disposed off by our helper haha (Sorry Angah for destroying your flower xD). Everyday I watered the pot waiting for any signs of sprouts to emerge from the earth when finally two sprouted and it was weirdly satisfying to know that I was the one nurturing it. The sprouts felt like my baby haha. I continued taking care of em until I had to move away for college. Not one day I didn't remind my sisters to water the newly transferred to larger ground sprouts and kept up to date with em. Weeks went by until one day le sis sent me a picture of my baby, the sunflower. It was awesome. Seeing my sunflower standing so tall though looking a bit malnourished haha. But to know that I had a hand in the growth of the beautiful flower is a very proud moment for me. And of course I only get to see it in person during its last few days, when the petals are already falling off the flower. But then again, it did its time. Pictures were taken, memories are embedded in my head and heart. In conclusion, whether or not I am a green-finger, I'm not really sure but I will be sure to be more involved in this green activity in the future. Without further delay, I commence, the pictures of the life cycle of my sunflower; enjoy! 

This is when they first sprouted from the earth.  Sorry for the filter overload haha. In denial how unhealthy the earth is with all the whitish stuff growing on it; the internet said that it is some type of parasite? Idk. Woke up early, well more like didn't sleep the whole night just to see the progress of this babies was worth it.
Look how tall they've grown in a span of days or hours I'm not entirely sure. I literally waited for sunrise to see just how much they've grown. If they managed to survive the night or not.
Getting taller by the day.
Imagine the look on my face when I saw the extra leaves that had grown on this babies. I rmmbrd shedding a tear over this, I'm sure. It was an emotional moment for mama flower. Haha. I think by this time, my friends are already over the fact that I am in this flowering phase of my boring life for the constant rambling and picture update on my social medias haha.
Hours after the previous picture. The first sprout from the left opened up a bit and the rest grew bigger =D
A sprout who decided to show up after all. Late bloomer or should I say late sprout-er? Haha. I think it's the tiny pebbles in the sand. Maybe. Correct me if I'm wrong. I'm a noob.
Pic sis sent to me while I was away. Aunt transferred the sprouts to larger area as it was getting larger by the day. She's the green finger of the family, who am I to argue. Beside the tall one you can see the other shorter one. I'm not sure if the short one survived or not. The ants there is vicious. I planted some seeds there too but I saw with my own eyes the ants biting the sprouts and carrying it to wherever their nest is. Kinda sad but it is the cycle of life, literally.
May I present to you, the sole survivor (i think) of the sunflower clan. Though it wasn't the type of sunflower I thought it would be, I was hoping it would be the ones with the darker center, like the ones my neighbour planted infront of his house, which grew so tall and beautifully -.- but then again, my baby is my baby and I am a proud mama. Can't help but compare though, he has like 4 beds of tall beautiful sunflowers, like what?! How can you compete?! Heh.

Blast from the past

This is why song writer always have a recorder be it the traditional recorder or even their phone; to record any tune or melody they have whenever that idea bulb lights up or artists have a sketch book to doodle whenever inspiration strikes similar to writers who writes a line or two on their notebook/phone. 15 minutes ago I swear I have just the idea of what to write here and smarty pants me decided to stop typing after 10 words, goes to the bathroom and now living with the pain of having the idea disappear into thin air. Poof just like that. So after the evaporation of my idea, I went ahead and went snooping around my sister's long abandoned blog. Couldn't be bothered to read each word since the pics are more interesting which I'm sure what you guys feel about my blog xD. After seeing so many old pictures, one question popped in my head; does my photobucket account still exist? And luckily enough, I managed to not only discover which email I used for the acc but also managed to retrieve my username. Once I am logged in, let me tell you, a wave of nostalgia hit me. Of all the pictures I found in the acc, one pic hit me hard but at the same time a sense of relief and guilt overwhelmed me. Guilt because I need to dig so deep just to have that one pic of him when I spent so many years with him, but in a way relieved because at least, I have that one picture I could look back to. A picture I'll make sure will be immortalized at home, where he used to belong before he went back to his real home. Thank you God for lending him to us, he was a great companion. A fat, demanding, and spoiled companion who never fail to put a smile on my face whenever we locked eyes. I love you Yummy =)

Looking Back

Happy 22nd day of Eid celebration. People are slowly but surely getting back to their working pace with still the celebration in mind.  I am crawling towards that, literally. So not ready for reality, always looking back at pictures. Midsem is in a week time and I have mixed feelings bout it; I am so not ready for tests or any of that sorts but on the bright side, it is a step closer to finals and again, HOLIDAYS. I seriously go through classes with that in mind. On another note, I am happy that I get to spend at least one week of fasting with family in Sabah, with everyone finally being home. I am GLAD I decided to go back early as from what I heard, most of the classes ended up being canceled so props to spontaneous decision making that actually worked out good xD. Times were spent well going out with le family, cousins and friends. It was so great catching up with everyone. 

 With sweet heart Andrea. 
You have no idea how much I miss talking nonsense with her.
Biru-Biru Cafe, Gaya Street, KK

No secret of how noisy it is when cousins do gather. 
Everybody talks and no one listens xD 

Crab dugged out of its home in the sand by Daddy, after visiting late Grandpa and Grandma who were also laid to rest next to the beach.  Picture by @marinadrds (Instagram) since I have long given up on this creative picture taking thing. 
Pantai Emas, Kota Belud

 Biru-Biru Cafe in KK with the girls, picture taken by @andreasibarani (Instagram).
If you're looking for a cafe with laid back ambiance during late afternoon when it is less busy with home-style cooking , this is the cafe to go to. I swear the fried chicken is so totally similar to those cooked in our home and I literally inhaled the fried okra. In the evening, most of the backpackers would gather there and you could mingle around with them, a friend had claimed haha.

Paid a visit to Mount Kinabalu otw back from Sandakan via road. 

 Cousin Afif decided to come along with us to visit late Grandparents and to the beach. Can't remember the last time we went there.
Pantai Emas, Kota Belud

 Impromptu date with nature, dad decided to fulfill the long delayed plan to see fireflies.
It was magical to say the least. The boat ride was exhilarating and had woken up the adrenaline junkie in me when we entered the open water without life-vest haha.
 Kinda stupid but awesome. 
Kg. Kawa-Kawa, Kota Belud 
To know more about this cruise;
 Coconut trees. 
Kg. Kawa-Kawa, Kota Belud

 Sis caught me taking everything in. 

 Cousin Ija

Hard Rock Cafe with Azura and Fatin
 Great music, great service, great atmosphere, pricy.
Had to miss out on the live band, cuz us Asians have to be back home before 12.


Let's escape reality and never come back

Peace Thru Culture

I should be studying for Pharmacology test tomorrow but as usual, procrastination wins and a sudden thought about missing again the most anticipated event in my boring life, SIFF. To those who don't know, according to the Official Website of Sabah Cultural Board;

SIFF provides the opportunities for the culture enthusiasts to enjoy and witness the beauty and uniqueness of cultural dance performance by various ethnics of the world. SIFF is truly meant to be an East-West Cultural rendezvous in promoting peace through culture.
The main objective of the Sabah International Folklore Festival is to promote culture tourism among participating countries and to introduce the state’s rich and unique cultures. The objectives of the event are as follow:
  • To promote understanding and goodwill;
  • To celebrate mankind brotherhood through cultures;
  • To promote culture tourism among participating countries; and
  • To promote Sabah as an attractive tourists’ destination in Asia: Malaysia Truly Asia
It will be the 10th anniversary this year. I still remember the first time I attended this event, how happening everything is. There is so much that catches my eyes from the of coz, street foods outside the performance hall, the obligatory sausages, nuggets, cotton candy and handcrafts. I rmmbr there was a batik painting stall once for a cheap price you get to paint your own batik. Besides the foods, the atmosphere too lingers so vividly in my mind. How hardworking the crews are, how excited and nervous yet friendly the international and local dancers are. I remember going around the food stalls before the event starts, seeing the seller talking to the dancers, being able to ask for pictures from the dancers in their full costumes and them gladly striking a pose with wide smiles, though sometime only body languages was used due to language barrier. I'm sorry for the lacking of pictures as the pictures are looooooong gone in our virus infested desktop haha. The performances differs every year but one performance I want to talk about was from the flag tossing performance from Belgium. Each country are required to represent their country as the panel of judges and representing Belgium was a man I could only recall to be the cutest KFC uncle. Haha. After the team performed to their song, they decided to perform their rendition of flag tossing to Sayang Kinabalu song and the cutest thing ever happened. Their judge gleefully takes out a piece of paper with the Sayang Kinabalu lyrics and starts singing along wholeheartedly. Besides the insane happiness I felt watching him cutely and excitedly sing, a sense of pride does overwhelms me. Seeing someone from overseas put so much effort in trying to not only look for the lyrics, pronounce each word but to actually sing along to the song we grow up with is such a great experience. I swear a tear was spilled. One okay one. I'm emotional like that. How I wish I still have that picture with the judge. He was such a friendly guy. Another favorite part of the event is the closing after the winners have already been announced. When all the dancers are gathered on stage and the theme song is sang. Let me tell you, goosebumps. All the flags on stage, everyone singing along to the theme song. I don't think I can ever forget it. After everything sorta simmers down, the picture taking with the dancers commences. During this times, dad and mom will be outside talking to their colleges and we are left inside the halls. No amount of time will ever be enough for us to take pictures with the dancers with their colorful costumes. Everyone is very friendly except for one or two *girl I rmmbr you giving me the eye t-.-t haha. Don't mind that xD. We sisters would be there till two or three calls from mom or dad, then we'll be on our way outside where another photo sessions will be held with the dancers outside the hall haha. It never ends. It is really a great event and I TOTALLY RECOMMEND any photographers to come as you guys will not be disappointed with all the colours and cultures you will be able to capture because I am always awed by the end of it and left wanting more. I promise you. Being able to witness so many cultures for a reasonable price, without even leaving Sabah, this is what it is all about. Thumbs up. For more information on this year's schedule of events, do visit SABAH INTERNATIONAL FOLKLORE FESTIVAL

This is the only video of the opening and closing song I could find but still you could feel the energy there. I miss it so much.

This is the promotional video for this year's SIFF. I'm crying right now. Do come and experience it. I highly recommend it.